This blog was written April of 2017. How beautiful it is to reflect on how much has changed •and• what is & always will be True.

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"Surely your toes are going to fall off!" Oh the things we say to ourselves.

So maybe you've never said those exact words, but you know you've said some pretty ridiculous stuff to yourself too. And if you really don't think so, then I ask you this - have you really taken the time to leave distraction, sit still, get quiet, and listen in? It's crazy town up there, truly. But amidst all the chaos, opinions, stories, and voices, there is always something to be learned.

Last month was mine and my husband Kelton's 6 year wedding anniversary, so we drove out to the beach to stay for a night. One of the things I was most excited for was doing my practice (yoga & meditation) on the beach. The weather had been starting to get SO nice out, but of course that weekend we got rain, and even a little snow. I wasn't prepared for the cold, but I wasn't going to let it stop me either.

"Just a quick one then" I told myself as I grabbed my mala beads and warm tea. I headed outside and walked toward the beach, it was raining but not too bad, so I went and sat underneath the pier. I nestled into the sand, sat myself upright, and began my japa meditation (108 silent repetitions of manta using the beads of the mala necklace to count.) Immediately I hear the frantic voice of discomfort - "it's so cold out here, maybe you should just go back inside." Another voice says "you'll be fine. Stay. What else is there to notice?" I begin to listen. The sounds of waves crashing in on the shore and rain falling lightly on the wood above me is so beautiful, loud and soft at the same time. "You're toes are going numb and you're not even a third of the way done! You need to go back inside." "You'll be fine. Just finish. Circle back around, what else is there to notice?" The air was cold, but the breeze was so strong that it was actually quite invigorating. Slowly I was finding myself in the very center of my experience, very much alive and in all my senses. Then I caught myself say something I will never forget. "This would be so perfect if..."

I was alarmed. Why did I need it to be anything other than what it was to fully appreciate and enjoy the moment? After that realization there was a huge shift. Yes I was still cold but now instead of wanting to run away I found myself wanting to savor the moment. Ultimately to live is to feel right? So why would any one sensation or experience be any less than another? Each and every one serves it's own purpose. Then an even scarier thought came. How many times have I robbed myself of an experience because I wasn't accepting it for what it was, because I was focused on just one thing versus seeing the bigger picture?

The lens in which we view the world, our perspective, is everything. And IT IS a choice. So why do we so often choose to see things in a way that ultimately is causing us to suffer? Why do we tend to see things in black and white? If it's not good it's bad, and if it's bad it's not good. No. It is what it is. It's freezing and invigorating. It's uncomfortable and enjoyable. It's painful and necessary. It's frightening and exciting. It's tragic and beautiful. It's a trial and a blessing. Whatever it is, we can choose how we experience it. We can choose to accept. We can choose if and how we act. We can choose to appreciate. We can choose to learn. We can choose to be grateful. Over the last year and a half I've really started to come around to the idea that things don't happen TO us, they happen FOR us. That our soul chooses our circumstances for a specific reason, and it's our choice to take advantage or not. It's our choice to keeping moving or get stuck. It's our choice to grow or stay just as we are.

In the last month and a half or so I've found myself in new circumstances which I can see from two totally different angles. One, which was how I first saw things, is from a place of lack. A place of fear and discomfort. The other, which is where I find myself now, is from a place of faith. A place of inner knowing and ease. Instead of seeing my circumstances as bad, unfortunate, and needing to be different, I am choosing to accept them as being EXACTLY what I need. So instead of trying to fix, adjust, and change, I am choosing to take advantage of what I have like it's everything I'll ever need. Like I said in my last post, I am choosing to be guided by the part of me that knows what's best. And although I still find myself a little fearful and sometimes doubtful, I trust that as long as I stay open and aware that I will be given the resources, opportunities, and wisdom needed to navigate this path that I am meant to be on.

Ultimately our perception IS our reality. And it is my prayer that we will choose to see through a clearer lens. One that allows us to take advantage of our circumstances to learn, grow, and experience this life to the fullest for all that it has to offer.

With love,

Rayneen Thebeau